For some reason this little story keeps coming to mind so I thought I'd post it.
When I was in High School I had a very nice looking young man that would walk me to some of my classes. Upon arrival he would give me a kiss. Who am I kidding, we played a short game of tonsil hockey in the hall way. It was really...ummm innocent?
On the loud speaker every morning the school made announcements. Included in those announcements would be this: There is to be no PDA on campus. Finally, one day I asked a friend, "What is PDA?" I honestly had no clue. She informed me it was no public display of affection. Oh, wonder why they say that all the time? HUH?! I kid you not I did not connect the dots. That is very sad and I'm sure most of you are saying yea right.
The really sad part is NO one pulled me aside and spelled it out to me. No teacher no friend, no one. I'm sure since it was so obvious to them that they assumed I was just ignoring and being rebellious about the rule. Now don't get me wrong, I wasn't totally stupid. I knew that tonsil hockey in the hall way wasn't the best place. It was the only time that we saw each other. If some one had pulled me aside and spoke to me in private I would have been humiliated. I wouldn't have shown it I'm sure. However, I would have found a more private place to, like the band room, to *play*. I'm afraid that I do have to admit the behavior would not have stopped, just become more discreet.
So what's the point? Don't just assume that because it is obvious to you then it is obvious to others. Esp. if that person is a teenager!!
Speaking to a teenager about any thing in any way can be a very tricky thing! One approach one day will be well received, the same approach on a different day may launch a temper tantrum from Hell. I guess the thing to always remember is speak the truth with/in love.
My father-in-law gave the good advise of always ask questions. In asking questions you learn where the person really is in their thinking and lots of times the right questions asked will cause the person to see the answer with out you having to tell them.
OK, now that I've preached to the choir, I'm going to read my own advise and try to apply it.
Have a Happy Sunday!
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3 comments:
You are SO right! We, as teens, just did.not.get.it., did we?
Our children need our guidance, more than we like to realize.
GREAT post.
This is great advice for those who know teenagers, and I find that it doesn't stop there. So often I hear coworkers say (behind someone's back), "Why in the world doesn't she/he do it this way?" Or "I just don't understand why so-and-so..."
Those who jump to conclusions soon fall on their assumptions. Let's share in love rather than criticizing from afar!
Ok, girlie... here's my friendly nudge! : ) I miss reading your posts. What's happening this week? ((hugs))
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